i am still a bit concerned that i have not fully grieved the loss of my father, or grieved correctly - if that even makes sense.
and i am still in a state of confusion and cloudy-ness because ever since dad died - my life has completely stopped - everything i do is helping out the family. not that i don't have time for myself, but my thoughts are all about what everyone else needs not me.
not sure if it is obvious or not, but since ive been back i ve been out by myself in a social setting like twice
i moved away from tucson because of the rut *(hole)* i was in only to get here and the hole is deeper
but familiar - i hope things get better
i know that i will never get over the death of my dad
i just hope that each day will get better
and i wont experience too many set backs.
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