2010

wishing 2009 good riddance, 2010 should be much better - big changes in store for me in next few weeks - happy new year to you all and a shout out to those who helped me through 2009 it has been a struggle ( you know who you are... hopefully )


i will be back home in 8 weeks or so - i will be in limbo for the first time - self inflicted limbo - since 2001 - - i need this i deserve this....

getting out - and up

i am slowly getting out of this rut called my life.....
i went out to see friends/ former co workers this past two days
some i hadn't seen in a year or so
it was nice to be up and out
i think that since i have about 8 weeks left here - working wise
12 weeks here i need to get up and out more often.

hope....

my cousin who is older than me.... by 10 years has just gotten engaged
and has recently lost 60 pounds.....

there is hope for us all - i need to get my shit together

heritage

my great grandmother had a restaurant in washington dc - it was located next to the howard theater - which was the only place in dc at the time where black actors/actresses and singer musicians could perform and they went next door to my grandmother's restaurant to eat....

she was also the first black woman to have a liquor license in washington dc.

update - sort of...

i have an after end of my tucson fling schedule - i will find out soon
when i have to be in dallas, texas - i m going to a dallas mavericks game sometime in march - and this is good because i can start really getting my shit together and tying up loose ends and leave - i'm ready - two things i am really waiting for
1 - holiday bonus from work
2 - quarterly bonus from work which i should get in january or so

i can't believe the year is almost up... and i have nothing to show for it.

stuff....

i have been recently scanning other blogs - to either get more inspiration - or just to read something - i go through phases in which i read like a book a day and then nothing for 6 weeks - i am ending the 6 week period and i need a book to read pronto

anyway - back to what i was talking about previously
i've noticed a lot of blogs that deal with medical problems or issues of the author or someone in their family -

i dont have any medical issues worth talking about - ( here ) anyway
but i have come to realize that i am a cheater when it comes to relationships
either i cheat on my significant other - or i am the other man
a recent example was i was " seeing " this lady and i went out
with three other women during the 6 month period....

nothing happened but i knew then that when i am not getting treated how i want or get enough attention in a relationship - i'm out
searching for another woman to fill the void

i figure as long as i know how i am going to act then its an acceptable part of my behavior -

i love women too much to be with just one.