Blood

blood

..death is inside the bones, like a barking where there are no dogs.. Pablo Neruda

I have been bleeding from areas
where i should not be
evidence waking me up
from fits of sleeping
and not

i see blood and vomit on my hands, in the toilet
running with warm water down the sink
its calming
red blood
( mine)
escaping my body
running towards the ocean

i had thoughts of this
frequently
it wakes me up at night
i check the pillow
my sheets
this time its only a dream